Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Send Neuds Pleaz ...

Jez here ... just a quick observation. The internet is an amusing place. If you want to see a dog that is best friends with an elephant a quick google search will give you exactly that. If you've ever wondered what a hermaphrodite's genitals look like--well, google will give you great examples. Not sure if the rash you have is poison ivy? Wondering if the spider you found in your closet is a deadly black widow? Google, google GOOGLE. Images and websites abound for about any need, desire or query you might ever have.

Which leads me to what I find so amusing and annoying. Who are the people who come to a blog like this and submit requests via email & formspring along the lines of "send neuds pleaz" or "wud you look at my dick?" Aside from the lack of spelling or grammatical skills, what is truly appalling is the lack of any attempt at communicating anything beyond a basic demand/request. You say nothing complimentary. You don't even TRY to butter me up or connect with me. You aren't even TRYING at all.

If you want to see nude pictures, our blog has quite a few and will likely produce many, many more with time. If your need exceeds our current offering, well ... go google up some nudes. I assure you there are a gazillion out there. If you want someone to look at your appendange, then start a blog and post pictures of it. Soliciting me on this blog isn't really the best way to meet your exhibitionist needs. I'm too busy laughing at bad spelling and making fun of moronic messages to respond to them.

That said, if you take the time to compose an actual message ... say something of substance ... or at least craft a well written question that sounds like more than some depraved porn addict demanding "pussy" ... you will more than likely get a good reply. Cane and I are nice people. We love to interact with you. But we do have standards (though we have been known to forgive bad spelling if the message is awesome).

As always ... you can email (use the link on our profile page) or hit us up anonymously through our formspring. But make it worth our while. The Secretive Slut is a privilege, not a right.


  1. Thanks, Dick! I'm sure you deal with such random queries, too. By the way ... I love your wife's Sunday morning ritual of saying "goodbye." :)

  2. I find the posts you both make leave me wanting more.

  3. oh your last line made me laugh ;) people are too funny. there's something about being able to hide behind the web's mask that let's them grow balls they otherwise would not have.

  4. Funny post! I just spent the better part of an hour perusing your sight and reading old posts...I love your blog! I love your content, your pictures, your stories. Jez I can SO relate to much of your words. I too grew up as the daughter of an ultra-conservative baptist pastor. Just wanted to let you know you got a great thing going and I love your comments on dick-n-jane!

  5. Jane! I already loved YOUR blog ... but now I'm even more in love. you are a fellow PK as well? it's very very very nice to be understood--and even nicer to find a kindred spirit. Thanks for reading and commenting! xo

  6. You two have quite the love fest going on here. I'm glad you found each other's blogs!