Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Advice: Pussy & Complications

"i would like to tell you about a man that can eat some good damn pussy and can make love the best i have had in 29 yrs... OMG i would have loved to meet him 29 yrs ago. i just hope that he wants to make me his soon..... it's complicated and i just want to get past this point.... what do you do when there is another woman involved.... we've wanted each other for many years... please tell me what to do.... i think i LOVE him."

First off, my sympathies that you are now only experiencing great oral sex in your life. Better late than never, eh? But more importantly, what to do? However, there is too little information here:

How long has this affair been going on? Is the other woman his wife? Do they have children? Does his wife know about you? Do they have an open-relationship? What has he told you to lead you to hope that "he wants to make you his..."

Listen, you obviously have feelings that run deeper than flesh. But the torrid nature of your relationship with him can potentially be misleading. The blatant fact is, no matter how well you think you know him... you do not have a normal, grounded, basic relationship with this man because he is leading a (most likely) dishonest life. And that does not lay a good foundation for you two for any future you may have with him.

Right now, everything is heightened,secretive... fun. And while that might be exciting...sneaking off with him, slipping into the shadows to have mind-blowing sex, only to leave separately, panging with anticipation when it will happen again....

During these heightened-aspects, he's a great guy; sweet, passionate, attentive. You have no idea what he's like day in/out, or what will happen when sex becomes routine. Will the fire maintain? Or will he go looking for new thrills on the side, like it seems he might be doing with you?

Again, I have to little information to make a solid assessment. But your query does pose one all-encompassing question that you must ask yourself: how do you like being the other woman?

Because that what you are. No matter how loveless the relationship may be with his gf/wife... right now, and for an indefinite future, he's keeping you as his other woman.

Right now, he's buying your pride with orgasms and delivering nothing else. I hope they're as good as you say.

Jez, when you cuckold or MMF with Cane, do you plan on asking a friend or finding a stranger?

Christ, never a friend. Evveeer. First of all, even IF any of them were remotely attractive, the weirdness factor post-romp would be too much to handle. Secondly, see first half of previous sentence. Which leaves the question, where would we even start??

What do you want to know?

Getting Comfortable With Fantasies

I find it fascinating to hear people talk about relationships ... and how love fades and excitement wanes. "You have to keep working at it" is advice frequently tossed around, and though I see the value in the lesson, I find the delivery outright depressing. Ever since I first realized I was in love with Cain, I couldn't imagine not being giddy about him. Familiarity hasn't brought boredom ... instead it's brought greater security and confidence in US. There isn't a single thing I'm afraid to talk to him about, suggest or confess. If butterflies flee in wake of such bonding and closeness ... well, I can live without the butterflies. I don't think I could live without the level I've achieved with Cain--or the safety I feel in being my complete self.

Yeah, yeah, yeah ... I'm probably boring half of you and annoying the crap out of the rest. Love is great, love is grand ... blah, blah, blah. I'm annoying myself. But I have a point to make here.

On a recent excursion to the a "toy" store, I was amused that my very forthright Cane got shy and embarrassed when I would walk over to him with a dildo in my hands. I didn't think twice about it. I am secure with him and I know he's secure with me. I just forgot that his security is WITH ME and not with the rest of the world. He wasn't so keen on a bunch of strangers witnessing our assessment of potential purchases (especially when I was asking "do you think you'd enjoy this in your ass?"). He completely weirded out and I felt badly about it. I started to feel a little rejected ... that is, until I thought about the fact that I am blessed with his confidence and willingness to share such a private side of himself with me. I appreciate that. I'm grateful for it. And I doubt I'd be so cocky (pun intended) about juggling dildos in a sex shop if the man I adore and feel so secure with wasn't with me.

I think this is why I find my comfort with certain fantasies has increased with time. You know what I mean ... there are those things that turn us on in our heads ... and then there are the things we actually are willing to talk about or do in real life. I think its a sad (but true) reality in this world that many couples are most terrified of sharing their fantasies and desire with each other. Many women are scared to death of coming off like a "slut" to their men ... and many men are terrified of weirding out their ladies, or even more scared of revealing things that might make them "seem gay." It's rather tragic that people wind up hiding so much of themselves from the ones they should be the most comfortable with ... and this is why I find myself grateful for the openness I have with Cain.

He can talk about sharing me with another guy ... or watching me with another guy ... and it doesn't make me afraid he doesn't love me. It doesn't make me question his commitment. I'm not afraid he's gay because he gets rip-roaring hard at the idea of a threesome with another guy. I get turned on watching him get turned on. These fantasies have merged with mine in such a way that I feel ownership of them. Last weeks' video had me soaking wet. I kept thinking the entire time about how hot it would be to give Cain what he wants ... and to be right there with him.


So, this girl is an advocate of relationships that have grown and become stable and butterfly free. You might love the excitement of new love ... but I prefer the kind you can look right in the eye and ask, "Can I stick this in your ass?" That's real love right there and it's a happiness no money will ever be able to buy.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Web-Vid Wednesday

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Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Happy Sexy 2011

Before we delve into it... sidenote-- can you believe it’s friggin’ 2011?? I mean, that just sounds so future-y. Granted, I was...uh... only just born in 1993 (it’s the truth), but still it seems like 2011 was supposed to be some distant, science-fiction dystopian future, where we had flying cars, were unknowingly fed the reprocessed bodies of our dead, and the entirety of Earth’s population is dressed in identical metallic/reflective jump-suits. That, or the zombie-epidemic forces the surviving 1% of Earth’s population to band together into small, spread-out pockets in a vain hope of restarting civilization whilst traversing ruined cities, fending off marauding biker gangs and the undead..... all the while morale slowly drains amongst them which then quickly spirals into the group turning on themselves....

....but instead, in 2011, we just have these:


.... I guess they’ll hold me over until we invent warp-drives.... just so long as you don’t wear your Bluetooth headset anywhere else besides INSIDE your car. Seriously people... don’t be “that guy”. You’re not cool. Wearing one in public will not make girls turn, swoon, then fall on their knees and blow you right in front of Cinnabon. Motto for 2011: Keep It In the Car.

But I digress.

So once again,
HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope you all spent it like we did (below). Note, I did not mean to infer that is actually us. That’s my sister Tina... “the crazy one”. Pictured is her “midnight kiss”. She had just met that guy, like 10 seconds before midnight. She’s very forward, I know... but that’s why we call her “Crazy Tina”.


...Ok, that’s not Tina. I don’t even have a sister named Tina. But whoever that is, that’s one great way to ring in the new year.

So, where have we been and
what the hell happened?....

Well, darlings,
life happened, as it has been ever since I was born (back in 1993). And turns out “living” actually means having to pay people in Washington, whom I’ll never see or meet, pretty much all of the money I make annually. Cane, too. And since they want more money every year, we have to work longer and harder... and then suddenly, we haven’t posted in 9 months.

Indeed, I wish we could regale you with stories of torrid group-sex, midnight strangers in my bed while Cane listened in the other room, orgy-binges, bi-sexual encounters, rampant DP’s, and cream-pies all around....but alas, there was nary a dildo to be had---- in any hole, Cane’s or mine. Truth is, we turned into boring, exhausted adults, coupled with boring vanilla sex. Well, boring to YOU loyal readers, but not to us :-)

We started this blog as a tool to improve our communication about our sexual desires and fantasies... and to hopefully realize a few, and at the very least, vet them all, if only for cathartic means.

...but reading and talking all the time is
bor-ing!! We do have an audience: over 200k site hits and #76 in Top 100 sex-bloggers of 2010!!! (not sure how official that poll or ranking is, but we’ll take it graciously!).... and that audience (aka, you guys) needs to be carnally sated...

So, this year our motivation is YOU... our loyal readers; we don’t want to let you down, so along with our usual featured installments, editorials, pictures, videos, and observations..... we want you to come along
as we pioneer territories still unknown to us... that is to say, our darkest fantasies we have still yet to realize. Yes, we are actually going to gather up the courage and DO THESE (well, at least some) while we’re still young, relatively attractive, and the siege with gravity is not yet lost.

What are these fantasies? Some we’ve talked about, some we haven’t. I’m sure you can guess a few, and I’m sure you have no idea what you’re in store for... but you’ll be along for the ride.

I can’t promise you all 52 weeks of 2011 are going to be jammed packed with ample content.... remember life is still kicking our asses daily...
but we can promise you we are back... and it should be one hell of a year!

So, as always,
stay tuned kiddies....

... and until then, here are some
fine fuckin’ pictures (literally!) of yours truly and the man of her life.


All rights, “The Secretive Slut” 2011.

...and for fuck’s sake, if you’re going to repost these, do us the courtesy of linking back to our blog. xxox!!

Monday, January 3, 2011

She Returns...

Guess who, darlings? Yes, that's me. And I'm back.

Stay tuned...